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Karma

March 14, 2012

Tonight, my 16 month old daughter and I argued over bath time and having her follow simple instructions in order to complete this task in under 2 hours.  Mothering is challenging and frustrating at times.  Then, in her brand new ‘dora the explorer’ nightgown mothering is heart swelling and my mind drifts to… ‘oh how I love that little spit fire.’  I wonder if she reads my thoughts, wonder if she knows that my love for her runs so deep that no bath time argument could even sligthly dim it.  I sure never understood that about my own Mother before I met Addilyn.  I look at her soft, wet curls fresh out of the bath and her smooth, pale skin and I kiss her good night trying to imagine a day where she understands how much a Mother loves their child.  It’s too much of a stretch.  I can’t even imagine her making it through bath time and teeth brushing without an ‘episode’.  Maybe I can’t imagine anything because all my creativity has been put into how I can get bath and bed completed with as few ‘no’s’ as possible. 

Some say, she is like her Mommy.  I say, she is all her own and watching her assert who she is, is miraculous and enfuriating.  My own karma coming back to me.  May she too someday understand Motherhood and karma.

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